The spring season is often when I spend a lot of time weeding the garden. I have great respect for the tenacity of weeds, while recognizing that they will ultimately hurt the plants I want to grow. So, I carefully prune. I was outside today pulling some particularly pesky weeds. And it got me thinking, we encounter quite a few “weeds” in leadership as well. Here are three elements of leadership situations we want to prune as best we can.
Untethered negativity
We all encounter situations that lead us to have negative emotions from time to time. Maybe we started the day off arguing with a family member. Or, we may have received work-related news that frustrated us. In both cases, we totally understand how that negativity might spill over into other aspects of our lives. And, part of being a good colleague and friend is giving people space and grace to express those emotions.
However, at some point, that negativity becomes a weed. When that negativity is “untethered,” when it exists for only its own sake, the weed needs to be pruned. How can you tell if negativity is untethered? When negativity and frustration seep into every situation, that’s untethered. When the person is unwilling to help think through processes to solve a problem, that’s untethered. When the person repeatedly allows negativity to hurt relationships and sour interactions, that’s untethered. This form of negativity knows no bounds. It is destined to continue and, like all weeds, to spread.
How do we prune it? First, by engaging in difficult and supportive conversations. People need to know that their negativity is affecting other people’s lives. Second, we must build boundaries. At some point, people have to be willing to change their approach. And if they can’t? Then another role may be better for them. Ultimately, while we can support negativity when it arises, boundaries must be in place.
Toxic positivity
Life is rarely perfect. While we don’t want unnecessary negativity or frustration, we do need regular doses of pragmatism. Ideas and practices have to work. Without that, action can’t be taken, change can’t happen, and learning is stunted or stopped entirely. Toxic positivity occurs when we make everything sound perfect, thereby discounting the feelings of those who see things differently. When organizations adopt toxic positivity, they cover up imperfections.
And toxic positivity spreads very easily, too. People aren’t always comfortable being the naysayers, even when the truth is behind the critical feedback. If toxic positivity is allowed to take over, a culture of inauthenticity begins to form; people say one thing while believing another. Trust is lost, and collaboration can cease.
Pruning toxic positivity requires a willingness to speak out and share an individual perspective. Leaders are in a unique position to do this, and modeling polite and evidence-based feedback often helps. The goal is to let people stay positive if they choose, while also addressing differing viewpoints. The more varied viewpoints are shared, the more others will contribute their perspectives. Eventually, everyone’s truth can be heard. The weeds may never disappear fully, but they can be contained.
Inequity of work
Finally, it is worth acknowledging the weedy leadership situation that arises from inequity of work. We all know that our roles are different and often involve alternating between intense focus and relaxed attention. We also know that some members of our teams have more work to do than others. Whether teacher, administrator, support staff, or other service provider, inequity of work exists everywhere. The challenge here is that the weeds of work inequity send a message to people that their contributions are not valued as much as others’. And, this can often lead to reduced motivation, anger with others, and a lack of commitment to the mission and vision at hand.
Leaders can prune these weeds by regularly examining roles and tasks, considering work input and output, and collecting data directly from team members on how their roles are filling their cups (or not.) Balancing workloads based on people’s strengths is always a valuable move. And while change is never easy, change that incorporates voice and recognizes skillsets is always easier. It’s important to check in during these shifts and make adjustments as needed. Not looking for the weeds or choosing to remove them could be interpreted as welcoming them.
Weedy leadership requires recognizing situations that could become problematic and a willingness to take action, sometimes methodically over a long period of time. We can’t necessarily prune all the weeds at once, and sometimes, we can’t prune the majority of them at all. What we can do is accept that they require constant attention to be effectively dealt with and that even if we are successful in removing them, they will likely come back, and sometimes in a very different form. Working through weedy leadership is something we all can do, and we all must do, even if we want to ignore the weeds. Because once they’ve taken over, they are near impossible to get rid of! What other elements of weedy leadership do you encounter?
Opinions expressed by SmartBrief contributors are their own.
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